KCI The Anti_Meth Site

Rape and Meth - Does meth make you act on feelings?

sk8rmom	Rape, meth, sexual effects... Ok. I did read the info on sexual effects. This is the story. My son's best friend from high school attemped rape. No reason to fear him, I thought. He asked to sleep on my couch (younger son at dad's). Came into my room, got "fresh" then left and I thought that was that. Then I awoke to find him naked in my bed at 3 am. Finally, with the threat of calling the police he went to the couch. I did report it after I realized what happened. Last Sunday he came back, called my son's cell phone which I had in the car said "door was unlocked, I needed to use your bathroom and didn't want to scare you when you got back." Ignoring my instincts, I went home tried to talk to him. No interest in talking (except "in your bedroom"}. Picked me up easily, tried to carry me to my room, dog prevented by nipping. I asked him to leave. He asked me "am I sexy?" i say for someone else. Try to tell him he is like a son. Talk about the meth, says he's clean, touching, flattery. Said he has "wanted to for quite awhile." Finally say, "go just go" and he leaves. He will be 21 in August, I am 49. Have known him (a sweet, quiet, talented young man) since he was 14. I am confused about all of this and just don't understand why. Is there a why? Does meth make you act on buried feelings with no regard to consequence? Why?
guest who	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... Are you kidding? Your post has a "Did he really like me vibe" going on. Stay as far away from that kid as possible if you don't want something to happen. That dude is gonna @#%$ you whether you want it or not if you go around him again.
SOS 1988	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... Meth makes you incredibly horny (me and a lotta people ive met). Also makes you willing to before dirty acts with people you wouldnt normally want to perform them with. Not like being drunk, but standards do drop. Maybe he has a crush on you or something ? Thats a trippy story. Stay away from him, you can't rape the willing; so watch out....take that shyt seriously......especially if you suspect meth....it makes you go apeshyt
luve piphany	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... Poor kid hasn't become a man before he damaged his developing brain! He hasn't even had a chance to develop his morals and meth has proven to make any and all morals that are implanted-disappear. I liken the 40 something meth addict I love and know, to a 17 year old a lot of the time because of his thinking and actions. He has digressed immensely! I hope you take this very seriously and take some action to make him accountable for his. You certainly can't Help him by giving him your attention.
teqa peq	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... Do you know that he using meth or are you making an assumption bases on his iradic behavior? Maybe a call to his parents to let them know about his behavior before he gets himself into trouble.
Broken N2	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... Meth makes you obsess over things...think about them for hours. Sounds like he is obsessed with you....&...a booty call or two. Sounds like he has taken things a little to far already..stop trying to talk to him about it and get tough with him or he will not stop until he has his way with you.
XOutlaw Woman	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... What did the police do? Personally I think you need to be the 49 year old here and tell him straight out to leave and not come back. Don't "ask", TELL. In my opinion you are sending mixed signals to this young man based on what you describe here. Meth does increase the desire for sex, and it certianly can make people bolder than usual, but I think there is more to this picture.
soso confused	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... I agree with XOutlawwoman. Set this kid straight by not allowing him back in your house. How can you let someone you find naked in your bed stay in your house? At 21, he knows that behavior is unacceptable and at 49 YOU CERTAINLY know it is. Why do you feel you have to help him in any way? If you are saying he attempted to rape you, again why would you allow him to be there? Meth or no meth, attempted sexual assault is not okay. Think of the message you are sending if you are curious as to why it happened. It happened and you need to make sure it doesn't again.
kell	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... *Quote:* Then I awoke to him naked in my bed at 3 am. finally, with the threat of police he went to the couch. That is creepy weird on both ends IMO. He gets naked while you're sleeping and yet you STILL allow him to stay. Something is very wrong with this picture.
sickand tired77	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... I'm inclined to agree with kell... In fact, "creepy weird" was my exact thought! I have no understanding as to why you would still allow him to come around after all that... I'd start locking my doors & make clear that he isn't welcome in your home. IMO, he really has no business there without your son around anyway. This strikes me as a mom trying to be cool to her son's friends... but more often than not, "cool" isn't the best way to be.
Lisa	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... I'm a "cool" mom....our home is the place kids come when they run away. I'm the mom my son's friends ask to call THEIR mom to explain their behavior. I'm the mom the kids will ask for advice. They call me "Mom". BUT, they'd NEVER, and I mean NEVER, get the message there was even a REMOTE POSSIBILITY of coming into my room uninvited, much less climbing into bed with me...clothed or not! It's possible to be cool and have boundaries, too.
sickand tired77	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... *Quote:* It's possible to be cool and have boundaries, too. Lisa, you hit the nail on the head... cool with boundaries. What I meant, and I don't think I conveyed it very well, is that you have to show some degree of authority w/ your kids & their friends. They need to know & respect your reasonable boundaries. You can be a friend to them, but boundaries are essential!
sabino2	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... Just my two cents here.... and I would like an opinions on this too. I think the "meth made me do it" answer is crap. A friend of mine who is a defense attorney is representing a guy who brutally raped and sodomized a few women and he is trying to say the meth made him do it. The lawyer asked me my personal opinion and I disagree with it, I think a rapist is a rapist.
XOutlaw Woman	Re: Rape, meth, sexual effects... I agree Sabino. A rapist is a rapist, a murderer is a murderer, and abuser is an abuser. Meth (or anything else for that matter) never made me do anything I wasn't already willing to do anyway. It just made my conscience go away so I didn't feel bad about doing it.